What Happens When You: Work, Date, And Try To Stay Away From Crazies
It all goes horribly wrong.
When Your Slumlord Takes Out A Piece Of Glass Out Of Naked Yogi Roommate's Foot... With A Shot Vac8/21/2015 Such a guy solution.
Slumlord breaks glass, and cleans, like a guy (aka not well) Naked Yogi, is well naked and barefoot steps on a piece of glass and howls for Slumlord to help. Slumlord pries with shitty tweezers and resorts to the shot vac.to suction out the big chunk of glass. Shot vac on foot = glass pulls out of foot. Both smile and say surgery was successful.. Moral of the story: I live with idiots.
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Me: "Ugh my roommate never wears shirts or pants. I mean, he works out 3.5 hours a day, so he is buff, but like it's still gross."
Sister: "Yeah, my boyfriend was laying around the bed without a shirt and I was so disgusted. And he had all this hair just sticking straight up that looked like those troll dolls. So I asked him if I could push a gem into his belly button so I could rub his tummy and make a wish. He got a shirt on immediately and went and got a haircut." Me: "God, you are brilliant." asdjf@;kjsdfklasdf I just wanted to do something different for a random festival. Should have read the box more carefully.
#notsogreatideaslateatnight Can't redye until I get back from vacation (because chlorine messes with it) - bosses will have to deal with it. And the hat I will be wearing for a while. Seriously! Your main dating picture! And here I paid money to Grouper to meet this special person who wants girls to look at his junk! #classy #winner
He might as well have put a heart around his package like Perez Hilton does it - I would have laughed and been more interested at the Grouper. I had just met her an hour before that for the first time... girl be cray or something. Made me pretty livid to be honest.
Sashay away, girl. Sashay away He was supposed to take us out for my early bday dinner at a nice sushi restaurant. Instead, changed his mind in route to go to this tikki/native american/karaoke themed dive restaurant. When we said we weren't interested, he kept driving there because he was determined to have us go with him so he wouldn't look like the lone pervert creeping on the waitresses (known for being scantily clad asian girls).
Needless to say: 1)He owes me another birthday dinner (at a place of my choice) and 2) He left that Asian Hooters very happy... xAubrey Went to a concert last night - can't work off of 3 hours of sleep anymore. I couldn't even pretend I didn't prepare to sleep in my car or didn't have the accessories for it...
Note to self: Drive to a different parking lot and not be parked in the front of the building. But sleeping in car? Motto: Can't stop, won't stop |
AubreyA girl trying to enjoy life on the West Coast without any worries, but odd things just keep happening. Archives
November 2016
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