What Happens When You: Work, Date, And Try To Stay Away From Crazies
It all goes horribly wrong.
So i went to a local Oktoberfest festival with my roommates (Slumlord and Naked Yogi) and met up with two girlfriends Cee Cee and Dee
It was Dee's birthday - she turned 33 that day (and Cee Cee is 31). Both of them are very, very pretty and they look like they are about 24 years old MAX. No one believes them when they say their age I arrive with Naked Yogi and Slumlord at the meeting place to meet up with the girls. Naked Yogi: "You fine ladies come here to pick up guys?" Dee: "Sure. Why not? It's my birthday and meeting new guys would be fun." Naked Yogi: "Alright, alright. I like your answer. Yeah you need to get on that because you are getting up there." Me, Dee and Cee Cee just death stare him. Needless to say Dee is the most annoyed out of all of us and we ditch Naked Yogi and Slumlord there. Fast Forward 2 Hours Later: Cee Cee thinks it's a good idea to sit on a bench outside and pick up guys walking by. Two preppy guys stop to chat. Me (in my head): "Sh$t they look young. Pretty sure they look jailbait young. I am just going to sit here and watch this unfold." Cee Cee and Dee start flirting back 5 minutes into it, finally Dee asks: "Ok, just how old are you guys." Guy 1: "21." Dee: "Ha ha, okay you guys seem nice, but you got to go. I am way older than you guys." Guy 1: "If I say I am 25 would that help? (Yeah he is still trying). It can't be that big of a difference." Dee: "Yeah, I am still older." Guy 1: "How old are you really?" (Dee should have lied in my opinion) Dee: "33." Guy 2 says to Guy 1: "Duuuuudddeee, she could be like your mom or something." At this point I can't help but start laughing Guy 2 sees I am just laughing and sees Dee start laughing so much she is crying. Guy 2 to Dee: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you, Ma'am." And proceeds to pat her on the shoulder like you do someone who is a child or super elderly Just an fyi: Words of advice/wisdom: BOYS - never call a girl "Ma'am" unless she is like 60 So by this point i am still on ground, rolling with laughter, Dee is laughing/crying harder, Cee Cee is just falling off the bench laughing Guy 2 looks confused: "Have I done something? I was trying to be respectful." At thing point there is no salvaging this and I say: "Yeah, we got to go. We have to get jello from the community center and we need time to race our walkers there." Guy 1 and 2 literally floundered for like 2 awkward minutes not knowing what to do as we are just laughing so much our stomachs hurt, then they (did the wise thing and) bolted. Poor Dee, got insulted twice on her birthday. Thank god there was a ton of beer at the Oktoberfest to help (a little bit).
1 Comment
binny
3/8/2023 12:09:37 pm
Hi its really the women over 35 years old who your not suppose to ask for their age. is it posible to change that phase to never ask a women about her age please.
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AubreyA girl trying to enjoy life on the West Coast without any worries, but odd things just keep happening. Archives
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